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Monthly Archives: February 2011

Redundancy Plan

For months now I’ve known that my role was not going to be secure after 31st of March. And though the first thing I thought about was not quitting, for the sake of my father’s health and wanting to be of some use and providing financial support, if ever he was to be found on his last day. I knew that at some point I’d have to fit in personal business in order to live. Inevitably one of those situations was going to put me out of a job either way. So what could happen to me if I didn’t have a job? For a minute it all came falling down on me, way too quickly and blood was rushing through my head as though I was running late for work.

I thought there must be hundreds of people with intriguing dilemmas at work, who refuse to give up but don’t know where to start. Or haven’t been ready or willing to face the issue that they only have a month or two left of a job. Plus as a Career Coach I’m always finding solutions for other people’s dilemmas. I’m bound to find one for me. Even if, I have to analyse every ounce of myself and take my own advice.

So I started thinking of what I would do when this job finishes. With the knowledge that the new government will also affect me finding appropriate roles in my industry. Career Coaching-Career Advice.

So at the end of January when my Manager confirmed the end of my role, I started putting all this thinking into action.

Now the last few weeks have been mind boggling. I’ve gone from dabbling with thoughts in my mind, to breaking my ideas into small chunks and just playing with it. Cause let’s face it there is only one way to eat an elephant really; one chunk at a time. As I was reviewing myself I decided a bit of brainstorming would help, just to see how well I’m doing.

So this is the steps I ’ve decided to take:

1st I thought to myself, I love what I do but I can’t work in a non-creative and conforming

Environment, it sucks out my energy and makes me stagnant eventually.

I’m at my best when I am-

  • Able to bring the best out in people
  • Creating links and liaising with people
  • Inspiring
  • Starting new projects
  • Writing
  • Speaking –facilitating and training
  • One to one contact with clients
  • Make use of my cultural upbringing and language skills
  • Styling and the world of Fashion

But for some reason I really don’t know how I could bring all these talents and ideas together?

2nd Knowing that my future job is not straight forward, I may probably need some more time to figure it out once this job finishes.

3rd I could possibly do a number of things use some of these ideas to run a pilot or volunteer somewhere where I could freely use my talent, start an internship, learn how to freelance consistently. Use the experiences or just see where that would lead to.

4th During my time out I could really do with completing my PTTLS course- A teacher training course.

5th Accepting the fact that this may take an extra 3 months from the end of contract period. In hindsight it could take 6 months to a year which is tough to digest but will give me focus to put those ideas into practice

6th Also look into higher qualification such as CBT- Cognitive behaviour therapy and Solution Focused Therapy.

7th I will not jump back into any job out of desperation unless it’s in line with my idea project.

8th I will truly focus on what I’m good, the environment in which I work and rather than what I’m not good at.

9th seek people who might help me in the areas where I struggle the most. People interested in my play project or people that can hook me up with other people.

10th Find other writers and write a blog – which I am doing right now.

11th Update and maintain this blog regularly at least once- a week and write three times a week or as often as I possibly can.

12th Doing at least 3 new activities a week to discover new opportunities

13th I’m still toying with the idea of an Open University degree in psychology- needs further investigation.

I think these are things which I need to implement straight away and I’ve started connecting with various people already who might be able to help and hold me accountable. This is not a bulletproof plan however as I don’t believe in bullet-proofness. It’s kind of a set up to fail really . I guess the good thing would be to give myself the chance to change this plan on multiple occasion or twick it so to speak.

So I guess the idea continues to grow

Redundancy a new begining or my ultimate death?

So for a starter, I heard a couple of weeks ago I was being made  redundant.  This is may come as a surprise to some but to me it was a  great relieve. I’ve been thinking of what I could be doing when it does  happen. It feels like a slow death and in a way it’s the perfect time  for me to kill my current career situation. It is probably one of the best escape routes that I could ever take.  I’ve totally outgrown the last three jobs I’ve had in a space of two  years. Well that’s a lie, I have taken jobs which were not challenging  enough for my mental and emotional capacity and now I’m feeling the  brim. It taste awful a little bit like when you pick up a fresh bottle  of milk and realise that what you drank was in fact sour milk. But it’s  a little late when you’ve swallowed it. It wasn’t good for you in the  first place. So let’s look at the things that got me stuck in this  place.              1.  Listening to my friends

2.  Listening to my family

3.  Trying to fit in and being normal

4.  I think I’ve allowed this whole world to get to me.

And considering all these things, I have wasted 17 months of my life  trying to live up to people’s expectations as well as my Rent and  council tax. I don’t know how I got there. I actually realise that I  shouldn’t have got this far. I guess it was one tough lesson in life  that I could have learned in 3 to 6 months to be honest. In 17 months I’ve experience two evictions, stranded with no money in a  foreign country, loss of a parent, two or three breakdown in friendship  and numerous relationship. Isolation, bullying at work, another parent  terminally ill, theft, homelessness and couch surfing for the countless  time, taking two jobs offers which I  should never have taken for the  sake of my rent. Simply not learning quick enough.

Finally, after a  continuous internal battle with me,…..Redundancy.  And when I think of it it’s not so bad considering I have lived like  the living dead for the past 17 month. I think it is time for me to kill  that person who’s been living in my shadow and pretending to live. I’m  going to bury her.  I realise that Redundancy is my death but it’s only the death of  pretence. Me sitting at my desk and and pretending to be busy with my  work when what I really want to do is part of something more, the death  of me fidgeting when I have to do tedious piece of work, when all I  want to do is be out and about talking to people, speaking motivating  and being stylish, the death of me starring at the Stylist magazine who  speaks to me every Wed morning on my way out of London underground  station. Never again do I want to do a desk job. This is the death of  me worrying about how I’m going to pay for my debts after paying for my  bills. And still, not being able to keep up.

So I welcome Redundancy. I believe it has come to liberate me from the  prison I have locked myself in. This cage I have created from myself  and starved the bird inside of me who’s been seeking and escape to sing  a new song. I know now that I should have never stayed in this job for  so long or the previous one, or the one before.

How did I let it get so bad. I know money will always be an issue to  worry about, relationship will come and go, and even people you truly  love will die but they’ll always be an obstacle in the middle of being  and doing something that you truly want. But I guess if I don’t try  I’ll never know. So this is somewhat of an Annual Report on life.

So….. I say Mat welcome to the land of the living for the last 17  month of walking amongst the dead and now I will begin to walk amongst  the living. So redundancy might in fact not be the end but the  beginning.

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